i sit here in the denver airport with tears streaming down my face
unsure of where i go next
i do not want to go back to where i have been
yet feel lost and directionless about where to go
all my effort
all my weekends
all my time
blood
sweat
tears
feel for not
i feel stupid
i feel ashamed
i feel betrayed
i feel
where do you go when you feel lost
where do you turn where there are no clear directions
it is beyond hard for me to keep moving forward
at this given moment i truly
don't know how.
those are words that seem foreign yet so familiar
way too familiar
as of late
my heart aches
my stomach churns
i feel sick
i feel broken
i feel battered
i feel unwanted
i feel
i want to live
i want to feel free
to feel happy
not like this
not like a fool
i have so much i want to say
i want to stand up for myself
i want to be proud of myself
yet i feel small and kicked around
it is true what they say
i am a gentle soul
underneath the punky hair
the big laugh
is someone who simply wants to do good things in the world
i want to make my daughter proud
i want to make a difference
here's to new beginnings
i hope mine comes tomorrow
happy reading
